I am Tired…
I am tired… But no, not physically, though that may be true. I am tired; mentally and emotionally. You see, this is something that happens often in a person like me, someone who does not show their true feelings. We lose a part of our humanity; that is the price we pay. Sometimes events happen that make us question the fundamental truths we have established. Such an event happened today…
Have you ever had a friend, for whom you would put great effort to help them? You would spend much time and energy just to help them for whatever cause. I’ve had such a friend. Have you then ever been disregarded and ignored, despite what you’ve done? It was such an event that provoked in me something I had not felt for ages: anger… And, anger is something I fear more than death. It causes us to act irrationally, to say and do things we may regret later, and to destroy foundations laid in and worked upon for years. I had not felt it in years; not this strongly at least.
An eternal anger passed. It brought with it new feelings and thoughts, washing away the remnants of that other thought. Anger gave way to sadness and disapointment. Sadness and disapointment gave way to exhaustion. Today I walked back under a dark canopy of storm clouds, with my hood as the only cover. I passed from dark of sky to the dark of the underground, and back to the dark of sky. I contemplated about how people always draw links between what they are feeling and the weather. And in my mind was Fuel, playing: Had a bad day again… I am tired, I need to rest…
